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Frank Crumit
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Donald the dub
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Fix lyrics Donald the dub by Frank Crumit
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Current song lyrics
Listen to the tale of a stalwart male<br />Who lost his well known Nanny<br />Donald was his name and golf was the game<br />That made him grey as his Granny<br /><br />He practised much but his style was such<br />That his handicap stayed at thirty<br />All the words he used when the ball he bruised<br />Were nothing else than dirty.<br /><br />In the locker room every night<br />He?d sing of his awful plight<br /><br />Oh! The dirty little pill went rolling down the hill<br />And rolled right into a bunker<br />From there to the green I took thirteen<br />And there by gosh I sunk ?er.<br /><br />I get no fun in the air and sun<br />But down in the traps I labour<br />I sweat and weep where the sand is deep<br />Till I want to murder my neighbour.<br /><br />(Spoken)<br />(thwack!) Oh! Baby, look at that drive. Wheee!<br />Now whoa, whoa. Whoa you? (out of bounds)<br />Alright, caddy, give me another ball.<br /><br />There was one great day that came his way<br />His score he was sure to diminish<br />Never had such form, then up came a storm<br />He was never able to finish<br /><br />He had a slice that was far from nice<br />From him it never parted<br />Once a year that shot, believe it or not<br />Came right back where it started.<br /><br />Do you wonder that he groans<br />And sighs and wails and moans.<br /><br />Oh! The dirty little pill went rolling down the hill<br />And rolled right into the water<br />And the reason it would seem, I lifted my beam<br />When I know I shouldn?t oughter.<br /><br />Then I hit a shot that I liked a lot<br />But it sailed right into the marshes<br />And I wished right then, like a lot of other men<br />That I had worn my galoshes.<br /><br />(spoken)<br />Hey, Donald, how many shots did you take over in that rock pile?<br />Let me see, one two three, er six I believe<br />Oh! You dirty so-and-so. I counted twelve time I heard your club hit something<br />Well, er, the other six were echoes. (hee hee)<br /><br />Now Donald the Dub joined the country club<br />And found a fellow duffer<br />Just as bad as he, so with shouts of glee<br />They started out to suffer.<br /><br />They played nine holes, and the poor little moles<br />Were never scared so badly<br />For the divots flew, and the cuss words too<br />And the birds and the bees left gladly<br /><br />As the end of the day drew nigh<br />Came a song that was sung with a sigh<br /><br />Oh! The dirty little pill went rolling down the hill<br />And rolled right into the club house<br />When I got there with sand in my hair<br />They changed it?s name to the Dub house.<br /><br />I?ve wrecked more ground than Columbus found<br />And the guy that I am after<br />Is the crazy scot who invented this plot,<br />That?s robbed all the world of laughter<br /><br />Now Donald the Dub broke club after club<br />As he told the world goodbye<br />For he suffered every hour when his game went sour<br />Even as you and I.
New song lyrics
Listen to the tale of a stalwart male<br />Who lost his well known Nanny<br />Donald was his name and golf was the game<br />That made him grey as his Granny<br /><br />He practised much but his style was such<br />That his handicap stayed at thirty<br />All the words he used when the ball he bruised<br />Were nothing else than dirty.<br /><br />In the locker room every night<br />He?d sing of his awful plight<br /><br />Oh! The dirty little pill went rolling down the hill<br />And rolled right into a bunker<br />From there to the green I took thirteen<br />And there by gosh I sunk ?er.<br /><br />I get no fun in the air and sun<br />But down in the traps I labour<br />I sweat and weep where the sand is deep<br />Till I want to murder my neighbour.<br /><br />(Spoken)<br />(thwack!) Oh! Baby, look at that drive. Wheee!<br />Now whoa, whoa. Whoa you? (out of bounds)<br />Alright, caddy, give me another ball.<br /><br />There was one great day that came his way<br />His score he was sure to diminish<br />Never had such form, then up came a storm<br />He was never able to finish<br /><br />He had a slice that was far from nice<br />From him it never parted<br />Once a year that shot, believe it or not<br />Came right back where it started.<br /><br />Do you wonder that he groans<br />And sighs and wails and moans.<br /><br />Oh! The dirty little pill went rolling down the hill<br />And rolled right into the water<br />And the reason it would seem, I lifted my beam<br />When I know I shouldn?t oughter.<br /><br />Then I hit a shot that I liked a lot<br />But it sailed right into the marshes<br />And I wished right then, like a lot of other men<br />That I had worn my galoshes.<br /><br />(spoken)<br />Hey, Donald, how many shots did you take over in that rock pile?<br />Let me see, one two three, er six I believe<br />Oh! You dirty so-and-so. I counted twelve time I heard your club hit something<br />Well, er, the other six were echoes. (hee hee)<br /><br />Now Donald the Dub joined the country club<br />And found a fellow duffer<br />Just as bad as he, so with shouts of glee<br />They started out to suffer.<br /><br />They played nine holes, and the poor little moles<br />Were never scared so badly<br />For the divots flew, and the cuss words too<br />And the birds and the bees left gladly<br /><br />As the end of the day drew nigh<br />Came a song that was sung with a sigh<br /><br />Oh! The dirty little pill went rolling down the hill<br />And rolled right into the club house<br />When I got there with sand in my hair<br />They changed it?s name to the Dub house.<br /><br />I?ve wrecked more ground than Columbus found<br />And the guy that I am after<br />Is the crazy scot who invented this plot,<br />That?s robbed all the world of laughter<br /><br />Now Donald the Dub broke club after club<br />As he told the world goodbye<br />For he suffered every hour when his game went sour<br />Even as you and I.
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